Let the flame burn

She was on a mission. Nothing was going to stop her.

Chin lifted high, head in the clouds, determination in every step, pounding the pavement with purpose.

On the cusp of full womanhood, her heart glowed fierce for the lover of her soul.

Scorning fear, she burned with a message to share. Tasting mercy and Love Divine for the first time ~ how could she help but speak about it?

Eyes bright with intent, she breezed her way into clubs and pubs, high school platform, public places, missions.

She was oblivious to hostile stares or rejection, swishing it away like the dress-folds dancing around her boots.

Here hope blazed bold.

Here lay a mind illuminated by Truth and a soul set on fire for God.

Now I marvel at her unself-consciousness, her courage, fortitude and faith.

My younger self ~ so secure in the fact she was loved and accepted by her Lord and Saviour ~ braving the boundaries of her time and situation.

All of this came before the catastrophic crash of a mind splintered by a mental health breakdown, until God helped her to slowly pick up and put together each shattered piece.

Before shame, guilt and fear haunted her days and nights.

Before the pressure and stress of life loomed large.

Before the Divine flame within flickered low almost to extinction.

Prior to pain pervading and pulverising her frame.

Before being bound by weakness, sickness and infirmity.

She walked strong. Kept the faith. Yielded all.

I barely recognise the young woman I used to be. A pang of regret and envy stirs deep.

I yearn for change. I desire for God to light a fire in me again. Let this flicker become a steady flame to warm other hearts and speak of His great love for me.

Maybe you do too?

We can all fall away in word, deed or thought. Give up seeking, asking, hoping, believing.

And now? I long to experience all that God has in mind for me right here, right now. In this Autumnal season of my life let there be a bonfire of all that holds me back. 

God gives us special grace as new believers to walk close and sense His Presence, to have joy in believing and knowing we are saved.

We’re on fire and it shows in our faces, behaviour and speech.

Then life intervenes… we falter, become neglectful and forgetful, doubts spring up; our flame becomes a mere spark.

We try to keep going in our own strength instead of relying on His.

But as long as there is even a hint, a faint glimmer of hope, and faith and trust in Him, God ignites the fire again. A smouldering wick He will not quench.

Will you join me in asking Him to ignite a fire again?

‘A prayer for change’

 

Lord of earth, sky and sea
would You ignite a fire in me?
As your Word beams laser-bright
into all-encompassing darkness, to reveal
a shining Light of Truth and purity,
so may I, in my small corner obscurity
be a glint and glimmer to all in sight
of Your great love, mercy, grace and light.

 

Whether by the words I write or speak
the acts I do throughout the week
all should tell of a burning love for You
that is consistent, deep and true.

 

And even if I am tired or sick
and my light is a wavering candlewick
I know that when the time is ready
You will make it flame strong and steady
to be a source of warmth to encourage another
weak and struggling sister or brother.

 

For I don’t want to sleep-walk through my days
but I do want to bathe in Your heavenly rays
and to be consumed in all I say or do
by what consumes You

Amen
©JoyLenton2014

Here’s a blast from the past for you ~ The group Parchment singing ‘Light up the Fire’. I was privileged to see them perform this live at SPREE {Spiritual Re-Emphasis} Conference just after I became a Christian. I hope you enjoy it too!

A few soul-enhancing, inspiring and firing-up reads to dip into:
 
 
 
‘Walking on Water ~ Reflections on Faith and Art’ by Madeleine L’Engle 

I always find time spent in God’s word and in His Presence, plus Christian books and music help fan the flame within.

I’d love you to share what helps to keep the flame alive in your spirit too.

Linking with Lyli  for #ThoughtProvokingThursday and with Mel for #EssentialFridays

You are warmly encouraged and invited to join in.

12 Comments

  1. Dear Joy
    I hear your yearning, my friend, and I understand this so well. We all come to that place in our walk with God that He weans us from relying one bit on our emotions and feelings. That is difficult for me, but as I learn, I find myself growing closer and closer to Jesus. What a beautiful poem and picture.
    Blessings XX
    Mia

    1. Dear Mia, your walk sounds so much like mine! To be weaned away from the heights of emotion can feel painful but if it enables us to walk more by faith than by sight/feelings, then it's a welcome thing indeed. And in the letting go of what seems comforting and familiar we find a new depth of relating to God, just as you say. Thank you for blessing me with your lovely comment, my friend 🙂 xx

  2. Joy, I liked this. I couldn't tell you how many times I've had to ask for my fire to be lit again. Basically, I get saved again about every other month, if things are going like they ought to. But God is faithful to do it. I'm glad to hear that you know you can ask him, too.

    Also, I always appreciate those who are upfront about mental illness. One of my roommates has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and one of my best friends suffers from depression. Both are on medication, but they're keenly aware of what meds do to them. It's a tradeoff of sorts, I guess. ANYWAY- It's good to see that out in the open. Blessings, friend.

    1. It's written within that we are on a long journey toward healing and wholness and sanctification is a major part of it. Although once is enough to ask for and receive salvation, becoming Christ-like takes the rest of our lives here. I share my stumbles in the dark, the shadowlands I have (and often do) inhabit, pain, weariness and weakness because they are testimony stories of God's tremendous grace in action.

      I'm glad you can relate to these issues and the devastating effects they can have on our lives. Meds go a long way in helping people to function better but they have their down side too. It is so often "a tradeoff of sorts" to appear 'normal' as such, as you say. We have schizophrenia and bipolar disorder affecting some family members and it is a huge challenge for them to live well within their boundaries sometimes.

      Thank you for visiting and sharing your insights. It is greatly appreciated. Blessings, friend. 🙂

  3. Joy,
    Thank you for sharing your burning desire for more of God and to shine for Him…I hope you know that you do, and I prayed for you and for me as I read your poem. So grateful, His Spirit fans our little flames ….

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